Working Class Citizen

I gotta job. I love my job. I am currently the first and third grade instructional aid who gets to work with mostly English language learners (ELLs) and the lower guys (both my favorite groups). I might enjoy the stories I leave with as much as I enjoy the kids who tell them.
Scene- I am working with a group of four students, all ELLs, on the floor of the hallway outside the classroom. I am teaching math.
Me: Who can tell me something you know about this shape?
Student 1: It has four pointers.
Me: Very good, it has four points. Anyone else have something to add?
Student 2: It has four sides.
Me: Great observation. Who else can add to that?
Student 3 (the funny one): My grandma had a butt surgery. She went to the hospital and they cut her butt right here (points to butt) and they sewed it up. (pause) she showed me.
Me: That’s nasty.
Student 3: Yeah. And, that’s a square.
Me: (I just sit there for a bit, unable to recover).

Scene- I am pulling students out one at a time to set reading goals for the next month.
Me: N. Can you tell me something you are good at?
N: (without hesitation) My Spanish accent.
Me: (impressed) WOW that’s awesome. You can speak Spanish? Can you say something to me in Spanish?
N: (with eyes that are attempting to control my brain as she sinks into her chair like a villain, she breaths) Spanish-aye
Me: (I just sit there for a bit, unable to recover).