It’s Just That I Am So Humble

Being humble is one of those catch 22 words in religion. You can’t be that guy that says, “I’m so humble. I am the most humble guy I know.” Because then you aren’t humble at all.

No one wants to listen to the guy that’s all, “I am so bad. I can’t do anything right. I can’t even look you in the eye as you point out that you like my hair because it’s so ugly.” It’s all moot anyway because deep down you’re thinking how awesome you like your hair for reals.

I have always warred with my motives, and since I don’t exactly suffer from low self esteem, humility for me always feels like a far away glowing orb. Some intangible thing I am always chasing.

I know it’s good. I know what God says about it.

“He has shown you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.” Micah 6:8

And here is where I sit. God has told me. Why can’t I stand where He says? Why are these two scenarios on humility my only options? Probably because I skip to Micah 6:8 and skim right over the verses that precede and follow it.
“Does the LORD take delight in thousands of rams, In ten thousand rivers of oil? Shall I present my firstborn for my rebellious acts, The fruit of my body for the sin of my soul? 8He has told you, O man, what is good; And what does the LORD require of you But to do justice, to love kindness, And to walk humbly with your God?”
I hear what he’s saying. All these things are petty. He doesn’t want my petty. 
When I allow these verses to sink in, I see what he really wants. Not false modesty. Not self-depracation. He wants me to do justice, love kindness, and walk humbly. I can be small without being invisible. I can be last without being nothing. God will take these tiny steps of DO and LOVE and walk them out in my life. 
He will translate them into a humble example to my children. Because I am a mom. Some of you are mamas. Some are daddies. Some are aunties, and uncles, and grandmas or grandpas.
Remember that first minute, holding that new little peanut. So perfect and pure and new? And our hearts were rocked and brought down 100 notches, and in that minute we knew the only thing that mattered was that little baby and how to love it the very best. That’s the place.
That’s the way we are to approach every single person because this is how God looks at each of us.
Heaven knows how often I have taken the road of offended. God knows how much further I need to go, but he also knows how hard I am trying. 
I am so completely a work in progress.